Overcome Life As A Single Parent
Source: Open Talk Magazine 12/12/2010 20:16:00
In today's society, if the two-parent home was an animal, it would be on the endangered species list. There are more than 14 million single parent homes in the United States alone; the huge majority being single mothers. Research studies indicate around half of all children in the United States will expend at least some of their youth in a single-parent home.
Are you a single parent now? Are you happy despite your single-parent status, or do you permit your conditions to place a grime outlook on life? Granted, being a single parent is a difficult task, but even as a single parent, be assured that your family life can still be successful. Below are practical measures to help you cope with the difficulties most single parents come to face:
Shun the negative labels. The Bible says: “All the days of the afflicted are bad; but the one who is good at heart will feast constantly.” (Proverbs 15:15). True, your life may not appear to be a feast. But as this verse points out, happiness is more a matter of the heart rather than one’s circumstances. No good is accomplished by thinking of your children as doomed, or of your home as desperately broken. Such labels will only dishearten you and make it hardest to carry out your parental duties.
Budget your money. The wallet is where most single parents, especially single mothers, are hit the hardest. Yet in many cases, financial pressure can be eased by effectual budgeting. A Bible proverb states: “Shrewd is the one that has seen the calamity and proceeds to conceal himself.” To get pass financial calamity, planning and foresight are essential.
Deal calmly with your ex-spouse. If you share guardianship, be conscious that bad mouthing your ex to your child, or using your child as a secret agent to see what is going on in your ex’s life is detrimental. It is far more beneficial to forge a working rapport with your ex regarding discipline or any other issue that affects the well-being of your child. The relationship with your ex is over, move on—you have a child to raise.
Be a good model for your children. True enough being a single parent can be a difficult task, but not an impossible one. Your children need a loving, strong, secured environment for healthy growth that you must provide. How you handle your new situation will have everlasting effects on your children’s future development. Now ask this: “What guideposts and behavior do I wish for my dear kids to learn? Do I mirror those morals and attitudes in my own life?” Are you jammed on resentment over the way your ex treated you? Your children are likely to take up the same attitudes concerning life they observe you display. Be a great model; mirror the good qualities—forgiveness, resilience, independence, strength—you want your children to adopt as they grow.
Take care of yourself by doing well. With the hectic pace of life, it’s all too easy to let your body and emotional health slide. Be careful not to fall into another trap! Bear in mind, a car with no fuel won’t get far, and neither will you if you don’t take time to “replenish.” Leisure is not a squander of time. It refreshes you and restores your strength so you can carry on your day to day duties as a single parent.
Living life as a single parent doesn’t have to be a dreadful experience. While many will agree two parents are better than one when it comes to balance in the household, sometimes these things cannot be avoided. Stay strong, stay true, love your children with everything you got and the rest will fall into place!